Music Psychology: The Power of Vibrational Frequency

Have you ever wondered why you have a complete disdain for specific styles of music?

This interesting phenomenon has been the subject of scientific inquiry, hoping to uncover the mystery as to why our musical preferences seem to be predetermined. Read more of this post

The Psychology of Music: Can Melody Help You To Sell Your Home?

Whether you are trapped in a cycle of debt and negative equity or simply wish to capitalise on existing market growth, you may well have a pressing need to put your home on the market. This is an immensely personal decision to undertake, although I admit to being influenced by market factors when considering the need to sell my house quickly and for a profit. Read more of this post

The Self Cleaning Brain

Evolutionary psychiatry, as a practical matter, is a way of applying evolutionary theory to the practice of medicine in order to elucidate low-risk, holistic, and effective ways to improve and prevent common modern mental health conditions. Though we are born with certain genes, temperaments, and can’t always prevent neglect, abuse, and trauma as we develop, there are many ways in which we can alter our environments and habits to more closely emulate the evolutionary past. One of the most important interventions I use as a practicing psychiatrist is to try to improve sleep quality. Read more of this post

Dream Psychology: Awakening Your Inner Vision

HJ: In the dream state, our minds are freed from the everyday limits of waking consciousness.  Dreams are intensely therapeutic and can offer us deep insight into the nature of our own being and the deepest recesses of our own psyche.  Dream psychology is a field of study in which a framework for understanding the complex and often mystical nature of dreams is being developed.  Understanding this realm of your conscious experience is essential for awakening your inner vision — that is, getting in touch with the nature of your own mind, soul and  spirit.  The article below is a fascinating exploration of these topics and is highly recommended for anyone interested in understanding and interpreting their dreams, and hence, better understanding themselves. Read more of this post

How to Achieve Balance in The Game of Life

When I take a good look at my life, what I have learned, and what I have experienced, I can honestly tell you that my primary motivation for living is to achieve balance. A life without balance develops into a life of anxiety, fear, and scarcity, all things that can be eliminated and avoided with awareness of your situation. Read more of this post

What is Your Ultimate Message to The Universe?

At 24 years of age, I can say that I have experienced a lot of ups and downs, much like every other person I know. It has taken plenty of time, effort, and experimenting, but I have learned how to maximize the positives in my life while also being able to simultaneously consciously ignore any perceived negative external influence. Having reached this stage in my temporary, yet abundant life, I find it crucial to share my feelings with everyone I come into contact with. I hope that they choose to do the same, and I have trouble seeing why the would not want to. Everyone benefits in the end game, teaching awareness is the least selfish endeavor available to mankind. My ultimate message that I find a desperate need to share with the universe at large is simply: radiate, receive, and share positive energy unconditionally. Read more of this post

ID,Ego and Super-Ego

According to the father of psychology, Sigmund Freud, the human personality consists of three parts which he labeled as the ID, the Ego and the Superego. Read more of this post

Are Your Ears Open or Shut?

 

If you are submersed in the self-development world you know how important building a new skill is. If you tend to over achieve, you currently have a list (mine topping 100) skills you wish to acquire within the next 5-10 years. This is because we strive to do better. No matter your position in life, growth is an important part of the human experience. Personal growth and development is communication skillssecond, only to spiritual growth. When we develop ourselves, we are constructing new and better ways to operate and play this game of life. This is not something narcissistic or selfish in fact, something quite the opposite. Self development and strategy creation, at it’s core, enables you to construct a life that is purpose driven, clearly charted, and geared towards positively influencing others. You see, when you dig deep you find that when you better yourself you impact the lives of others in a positive way. How? Because we strive to better our lives in positive ways. This causes a ripple effect that benefits all that we come into contact with. Some call it, The Midas Touch.

 

Communication & Embedded Communication Hints 

Communicating is a process of giving and taking.  The art of having a good conversation is rooted in a good listening skills – wait, great listening skills. In order to establish report and empathy for the other person, you have to understand exactly what they are saying. By listening to what they are speaking simply isn’t enough. We need to focus in on what they are implying based on the following list of conversational speak implications:

  1. Tone of voice on a single word or phrase 
  2. Tonal inflection during a story or analogy
  3. Where emphasis is placed
  4. Emotional implications
  5. The core root of the story that is told
  6. Facial expression when something is emphasized
  7. Body moments, especially: Shoulders, eye moments, and lack/heightened body control

These are just a few things to watch for when you are listening to someone. In most cases, individuals that you are listening to will drop “hidden” hints within their communication that we miss due to our lack of focus. In order to discover these hints, we need to slow down our inner thinking and focus in the moment as to what they are trying to communicate. For what they are trying to communicate can often differ from what they are saying — sometimes drastically.

So make this a game; listen intently the next time you are having a conversation with someone and try to decode what they are trying to communicate. Even if it is a brief encounter at a gas station or coffee shop, take that time to be completely present and focused honing in on the subtle, seemingly insignificant, suggestions that are embedded within their communication.

 

Silent Talking

Opening up to someone only happens if the other person is a good listener.  The listener needs to appear as though they are genuinely interested in what is being said. The best way to do this is to be, you guessed it, genuinely interested in what they have to say. If you follow the instructions above, you will start to notice that people will naturally open up to you. You will start to respond to their implications, not what they speaking auditorialy. You would say, “Oh, I see you are saying this and you mean that because of the emphasis placed on that emotional implication. Therefore, blah blah blah…” You would speak to them in context of where the conversation is, but taking the time to embed your own implications that coincide with their implications. Basically, you are speaking to them without words. If you are just waiting for the other person to stop so that you can speak your mind, you’re not a good listener, you’re certainly not a good communicator. In fact, what you are doing is implying that all you care about is your own opinion and not what they have to say. One final suggestion during this process: Allow for there to be a slight pause before you start to speak after they have finished their talking. This will allow the other person to notice your self control, allow time for you to collect a solid rebuttal, and suggest that you weren’t just waiting to talk and that you were intently listening to what they were saying.



think it aboutTips from an Expert

Here are some outstanding tips from author and speaker, Marilyn Ellis:

1. Attitude Adjustment: Be willing to change the way you think. Instead of considering a conversation to be a challenge to “persuade”, consider it a mutual journey. There are signs along the way and the postings will come naturally if you let them. Pay attention to the words that are used and don’t assume you understand their definition of a term. Words can be very personal and idiocentric and cultural and not mean what you think. Ask for clarity.

2. Noise Reduction: Quiet the noise in your head. Few of us actually listen with full participation. How many times have you simply waited for the other person to just stop talking so you could speak! Stop thinking and just listen, with full attention, no voices in your head. Notice the other persons body language, voice inflection, facial expressions as well as their word choices.

3. Reflect Back: When the other person has finished speaking, your reply should first and foremost be a ‘reflection” – that’s coach talk for repeating back to them what you thought you heard them say. It can be very surprising and humbling when you find out that you didn’t get what they just said. On the other hand, when you reach mutual agreement on what was actually said, everything changes.

4. Ego Removal: Let go of having to be right. There’s a business saying – “Do you want to fill your ego or your bank account?” The result is not that you are right, but that the problem for both parties is solved to mutual satisfaction. It might not be the solution you thought would be chosen, but it will be the solution that really works.

5. Make it a Win Win: Once the other person realizes that you actually heard what they said, they will most likely relax, share and trust you. That’s when true communication begins. That’s when the real conversations take place. That’s when problems get solutions and you have a chance to make your sale, prove your point and get what you want. When its a win win situation, there is potential for a deeper, more worthwhile and profitable relationship with your communication partner.

 
In Conclusion 
Listening skills helps you learn exactly what others are saying and aids you to approach them easier. By listening well, you can tackle the listening barriers and encourage effective communication through your own personal mediums of expression. So, remember to stop waiting to talk, pay detailed attention to others, and to leave a slight pause before speaking after them. Do you hear what I am saying?

Don’t Let Your Environment Control You!

Goal setting is one of the key strategies that will enhance your success in whatever you’re doing. When you set goals you are aligning thoughtyourself with the end resulting success. The numbers are in and only 8 out of 10 people set goals. Furthermore, only 9 out of 10 people set and KEEP goals for an extended period of time. If you already know what you want out of life and all you do is figure out what you have to do to get to that finish line. But what’s so silly about this is that goals are probably one of the easiest things to set up for your life. This is only two things you need in order for you goals to matter in your life. They are:

  1. Purpose for Each Goal > Rooted in deep emotional drive and association. 
  2. Clear, clean, concise goals > Your goals must be clear enough to create in internal image for your mind to follow.
  3. Massive Action Plan > Taking action sometimes isn’t enough. Taking massive action is the most important and yet most scary for most people.

There are many of great goals to achieve in your life, but there are some people who have never thought about goal setting. They haven’t even thought about the direction of their life. This is insane, and this behavior stops for you today. Going through life without a destination, plane, and flight plan, you will be flying blind for your entire life. Simply relying on the directions from other people, falling into a comfort zone.

In goal setting, we often see people set goals based on their current knowledge, environment  and what people say they can achieve. This  is such a tragedy  I can’t even express. There is absolutely nothing you can’t achieve if you follow the above three steps. What holds us back is how we view and reference our situations in life.

Two Way to Approach the Pre-Game to Goal Setting

There are two ways of thinking when you go to set goals, before you even put pen to paper.

  1. Changing the internal world (psyche) to match external world.  

VS.

2. Changing the external world to match the internal world.

 

The first is set up like this: The mental image changes to match influences that erect themselves in the individual’s point of view. This also takes little work on the part of the individual. The individual can simply go along with whatever the status quo is, operating on autopilot.

The second is set up like this: The individual requires the external world to change to the image perceived in the mind. This takes much more work, as the individual needs to consistently install the goal desired image. This approach takes contact care and strife. More diligence is needed, and the individual will be challenged at every turn.

 

Take control of your thoughts to today, and don’t let your environment control you by changing the way you think. Approach this type of “control” as a monitoring of your thoughts. Stress is not involved here. In fact, if you are stressed about “I must control each thought”, than this wont work for you. However, if you decide to watch each thought, then making a conscious decision as to whether to act or not, then you have found your strategy for achieving anything in your life that you want — even your most wildest dreams.

ANSWERED: Why is Cleanliness Next to Godliness?

 

I’m not going to vacuum until Sears makes one you can ride on. —Roseanne Barr

 

Cleaning is something that uplifts your spirits and gives your soul a sense of ease. Ironically, cleaning is also something that we seem to avoid at all costs. Why is this? Why do we seem to look to find ways to avoid cleaning. There are even entire industries build around doing the work for us. Are we lazy? I don’t think so. I think that cleaning is just like every large task. Unless we have a sense of directions and a strategy, it’s going to seem like a large task to undertake. When we don’t think we can do something before we have started it, we will tend to not start to avoid the pain of failing. However, this is cleaning out house folks. This is something that we should be happy to do. After all, this is the environment we inhabit for, at least, 8 hours every day while we sleep. The key is in how we see hour house. We if see our house as dirty, we wont want to do it might we fail. However, if we view our house as clean already we will strive to make it so when it’s not.

Not matter if your directly religious or not, we can all agree that Jesus was a great man and story-teller. He always talked about being pure; pure of spirit, character, thought, and action. The word pure here is used in the sense of inner purity. But there is a connection: It seems that when our inner environment is cleaned, our external environments seem to become clean as well. This is an interesting fact. It seems that the Buddha was right; “As inner is as outer”. So is it that simple? Do we just have to clean our insides and we will take action to clean our external world? Yes, it is that simple. But we need to take dedicated action either way. We need to take time for daily 30min meditations, and then 30mins cleaning sessions. If you have an excuse of any kind, look at it this way:

If you want 1 hour of negatively driven television per day, you can find time to clean your internal and external worlds.

This is not only for the benefit of yourself. This is for more powerful than just where you live. By taking these moments to do some housecleaning, you will install a mindset for purity. You will start to look for cleanliness rather than dirtiness. This simple shift in focus can completely change your life. When we look for clean vs. dirty our mind will look to “solve” the problem of dirtiness when there is some. For instance, you have now switched your thinking to see cleanliness and your house is dirty, your mind will say “Wait, this doesn’t match what I see. This must change.” You mind will start the thinking, you body will take action, your house will “magically” become clean. But this can only happen after first we shift our frame of mind from looking for dirt to looking for clean.

Cleanliness is next to Godliness because of mindset and attitude. Jesus talked about being pure in spirit and thought. His main focus was concerned with the internal world. Our focus should be concerned with both. We have the tools and resources to apply an internal focus that will influence our actions that will enable our environment to match how we are thinking.

“Ask and you shall receive; seek and you shall find.” Matt. 7:7

Organize your internal and the dishes will become clean.

How to Have an at Home Meditation Retreat

Was your week stressful? Let’s set up your own personal meditation retreat, right where you are.

Create your personal inner sanctum…

daily meditation retreat

Stillness.

We all know the benefits of taking time, but why not spoil yourself and take this resting time a step further to foster a retreat you deserve of. When we visit a retreat, we enter a place of calm and centeredness.

In order or us to take up the task of setting up our own personal meditation retreat, we need to know some things about a retreat frist. A retreat is a place where people go in order escape and find themselves in peaceful state of mind. Why we usually go somewhere else for a retreat because we don’t consider it possible in the current environment.

This means our inner state is directly controlled and influenced by the environment we are in. Therefore, in order to set up your personal meditation retreat, the first step is setting up your inner mental faculties to receiving your current environment as a retreat setting. This starts with, purpose. Understanding your own personal disposition with your environment will give you great insight as to quality of that relationship.

Setting Up the External:

Here are some tips, after you have your mind in check, to get your external environment ready for a at home meditation retreat:

1. Avoid morning caffeine.

Events will be a lot easier on your body if it doesn’t have to struggle with removing the toxins from caffeine.

2. Leave your phone.

Don’t just turn it off or on vibrate. Leave it behind completely. Once you get going, you wont miss it.

3. Do it alone and make it a legitimate ‘me’ event.

This gives your clarity as to what the focus is.

4. Flush out toxins by drinking water and using deep breathing.

This is important in order to keep your physiology in check.

5. Make your environment you own and personal.

If you like the smell of a particular incense or candle, use them.

6. Take this opportunity to improve your ability to concentrate and relax.

Use this time in self education. Learn how you can grow in the next week or month. You have the floor, take advantage of it.

Meditating everyday can be a tough commitment to stick to. With our busy modern lifestyle, we tend to find other things more important. However, what is more important than our own mental and spiritual development? If your schedule is crazy, use a “personal retreat” to hit the mental and spiritual reset button.

How about the weekend? The weekends always have some free time that you can use for meditation. Take a Friday after work to all day Saturday. Don’t leave the house. Plan ahead and acquire what you need in the house for that 24 hour personal retreat.

Things to Acquire:

  1. Juices 
  2. Fresh Vegetables
  3. A Spiritual Book
  4. Clean Water
  5. Incense / Candles
  6. Meditation CD / Music

If you have set aside a 24 hour block of time, acquired the needed things, and have your mental clarity ready, you are ready to embark on your first personal meditational retreat. The key thing to remember is that you are in control of what you do with your time. If you are being studious, you will apply introspection within this 24 hour period in order to understand yourself more fully and completely. The things you may discover during this time may be scary, but I assure you, they are extremely valuable.

Your Magic Magnet for Success

When it comes to habits, we all seem to resist. Even when the word is approach in language, we view it as a negative aspect of our existence  This, is a misconception. Habits can aid you in achieving the most amazing things. Things that may be seen as, after looking back on them, as miracles. Are they miracles? Maybe to some. Is there magic involved? More psychology and physiology,  but yes. Can you change your life right now by changing one thing you are doing? Yes! Read more of this post

Are You a Psychopath?

What a question!

“Of course I’m not a psychopath!”, you may be thinking. However, learning what it means to be a psychopath can generate knowledge into what to look for as our society becomes more and more involved in violence and negativity. Think of this as a source to bring your more socially aware. Read more of this post

What Can You Learn About Human Psychology From a Poker Game?

Having played poker competitively for the last few years, I have developed an understanding of how a variety of different poker players think and act at a poker table. No two opponents are exactly the same, but many poker players share very similar traits, especially the long-term losing players. A lot of long-term losing poker players are prone to being effected by their emotional state. At the poker table, one of your biggest weapons to becoming a long-term profitable player is understanding how the value of money affects certain players. When losing, a lot of weaker opponents tend to “chase their losses” hoping to break-even, but in the process, most of these players ultimately lose more money because they fail to regain the focus needed to win in the long-run. Read more of this post

The Way to Live Positively

Positive thinking is not just something for the meditator or religious person. Positive thinking is a power aspect of our existence that needs to be utilized more often as our world becomes more complex and technologically advanced. Reality is all about perception and how we view the world. Do you look for the negative in a situation or the positive? Do you think the way you view a situation impacts it’s outcome? positive Is it what you perceive it to be? If  situations are all truly in our heads, then we hold a massive power to influence our environment and the people in it. A positive outlook can completely change the way a situation presents itself. The question is, what is the full range of benefits that stem from thinking positively on a regular basis? Read more of this post